Ashes
by Egs
Summary: Cinderella begins to understand grief and why her Stepmother is the way she is. She is growing up. Eventual femslash
1. Chapter 1

The idea for this story popped into my head as I was giving someone some change. Inspired by the homeless crisis in Seattle

Cinderella stomped down the path towards the village, basket in hand. It was mid-afternoon, near the time she should be beginning to prepare dinner. Stepmother discovered they were out of tea and sent Cinderella to town to buy some. Never mind she was in the middle of trying to get the kitchen cleaned up to start dinner. Never mind that she had been running around since 6 AM and was exhausted. What Stepmother wanted, Stepmother got.

"Cinderella, do this! Cinderella, do that!" she huffed to herself down the path. "What do we care that you were in the middle of something! Just do what we say!"

She calmed herself down when she got to the village and took a deep breath to compose herself before going into the shop.

"Hello, Miss Ella," the shopkeeper greeted her. "Your stepmother need some ginger tea?"

"Why, yes!" Ella answered, surprise overcoming her grumpy mood. "How did you know?"

"She often buys some when she comes to town herself. Say it helps those terrible headaches she gets," the man answered. He wrapped a pound of ginger tea in brown paper and carefully taped it so it wouldn't spill.

_Terrible headaches_ Ella thought as she walked out of the store. _I wonder if they are why she is so cruel sometimes._

That made sense. Headaches hurt. Often her stepmother asked her to bring her a cup of tea. Now that she thought about it, her stepmother often looked pale and tired at those times.

Cinderella looked across the street. A beggar sat there, wrapped in a tattered blanket. A tin cup was next to her. Cinderella was astounded to see the girl was about her age.

There were several provocatively dressed young girls talking to men. Some went into the alleys. Further down the street, young children shined shoes for a few pennies. They scurried off to abandoned buildings.

An epiphany hit Cinderella like a bolt of lightening. Without her stepmother, she would be sleeping on the street with these children. She might be selling her body of a few pennies or a slice of bread. Stepmother might be cruel most of the time but she was still her family and she kept Cinderella with her. She didn't have to, but she did.

When her father died, Cinderella had been so caught up in her own grief that she didn't even think about her stepmother's. What must she have felt like, to have been widowed again. Widowed twice within only a few years! And with another child to raise. No wondered she was so cruel. She was probably overwhelmed. All her grief lashed out at Ella.

Cinderella counted out the change from the tea shop and went into another shop. A second hand store. Mother's Day was coming up and she wanted to get Stepmother something. Even a little something.

She looked around and wanted to buy a pair of earrings that would have brought out her stepmother's brilliant blue eyes, but they were too expensive. She looked around, trying to find something nice, but everything was out of her price range. She finally chose silk flower, the same shade of blue as her stepmother's eyes.

When she got back to the chateau, she automatically went to the kitchen and prepared her stepmother's ginger tea.

"Your tea, Stepm-Madam," she said when she brought it to her stepmother's room. "How is your headache?"

"Horrible," her stepmother replied. She took the cup of tea and sipped it.

Cinderella looked at her sympathetically. "Here, Stepmother. Let me help you."

She sat behind her stepmother on the bed and began to massage her neck. There was a huge knot at the base that Cinderella worked on for at least half an hour. She kneaded the knots in her stepmother's shoulders for almost an hour.

"Is that better?" Cinderella asked. "You were so stiff!"

"Yes, child, thank you," her stepmother said. She turned around and faced her stepdaughter. "You are very good at massage. Kneading bread and dough has made your fingers nimble."

Cinderella smiled nervously at the unexpected compliment. Her stepmother so rarely said anything kind to her that it was always a big shock when she did.

Her stepmother's cool blue eyes swept her up and down. "Next time I have a headache, you will massage it away."

Cinderella nodded. "Yes, ma'am. Of course."

"You can go to bed now," her stepmother said graciously. She waved at the door.

"Yes, ma'am. Thank you."

Her stepmother held her face up and Cinderella kissed her cheek. Ever since she married her father, her stepmother insisted on a good night kiss. Even on days she was particularly demanding and cruel, she made Cinderella kiss her good night.

Cinderella was very quiet the next few days. She seemed distracted, Stepmother thought. Very deep in thought. Her work was still fine but she didn't seem like herself. She would usually make a bit of small talk with the vapid stepsisters, or with her Stepmother. One thing her Stepmother was generous about was books. She had loaned Cinderella _Les Miserables _and would often ask her how far along she was in it. But now Cinderella said she had been too exhausted to read. Stepmother hoped she wasn't getting sick. She might not have been the most affectionate with her stepdaughter, but she did care about her.

Cinderella sat in her tower room, twirling the silk flower she bought Stepmother. She folded a piece of paper into a card and tried to think of something to write on it. Eventually she settled on a simple

_Happy Mother's Day_

_Love,_

_Ella_

She wrote Stepmother on the front of the note and brought them down to her stepmother's room. She set the note on her stepmother's vanity and covered the flower with a handkerchief. Both right in front of the mirror. Stepmother couldn't miss them.

Stepmother indeed see the flower. A headache was starting to pound and she told Cinderella to bring her some tea. She was going to have her massage her neck when she got there.

The note with _Stepmother_ printed on it caught her eye. She opened it and read Cinderella's short message, just as Cinderella knocked on the door with her tea.

"Your tea, Madam," Cinderella said unnecessarily. She set the steaming mug next to her stepmother. Then she saw the note in her stepmother's hand.

She gave Stepmother a nervous smile. "Look under the handkerchief."

Looking at her suspiciously, Stepmother picked the cloth up and saw the satin flower.

She looked up in surprise. "For Mother's Day," Cinderella explained. "I saw it at a shop when I was last in town." She held the flower next to her stepmother's shoulder.

"It matches your eyes. But I have the receipt if you don't like it."

Stepmother's surprised blue eyes met hers in the mirror. "You never got me anything for Mother's Day before."

Cinderella smiled guiltily. "I know. I'm sorry. I should have. Can you forgive me?"

Stepmother smirked. "Well, if you get these knots out of my shoulders, I suppose I can."

Cinderella began to massage her stepmother's neck with trembling fingers. She couldn't stop thinking about the homeless children she had seen on the street, and how if it weren't for her stepmother, she would be one of them. She had to stop reading _Les Miserables_ because all she could think about was that if anything happened to her stepmother, she would be like Fantine. Working in a factory fourteen hours a day, if lucky. Or selling her hair, teeth and body if not.

"You're awfully quiet," Lady Tremaine commented.

"I know you have a headache," Cinderella answered as she kneaded her stepmother's pale neck. "I know noise hurts."

Stepmother smirked. "Well, aren't you considerate."

Cinderella smiled tremulously. "I try to be."

Stepmother put her hand on her shaking stepdaughter's. "You can go to bed now, child."

"Yes, ma'am. Thank you," Cinderella said. She bent down to kiss her stepmother good night.

As she was about to open the door, her stepmother called, as if in an afterthought, "And Ella? Thank you for the flower."

Cinderella turned around and looked at her stepmother with wide, surprised dark eyes. Lady Tremaine almost never called her by her real name anymore. She'd only signed the card Ella because she thought her stepmother had forget it. But more than that, she could never remember being thanked for anything.

Lady Tremaine smirked even more at her stepdaughter's stunned expression. "Good night, dear. Sleep well."

Cinderella nodded. "Yes ma'am. Thank you. I hope your headache feels better."

She went up to her tower and lay on her bed. _Stepmother thanked me _she thought.

But more than anything, she thought about those haunting homeless children. She needed to let her stepmother know how much she cared about her, how she understood her grief now. She was too young when her father died to understand anything but her own heartbreak. But she was old enough to understand now.


	2. Chapter 2

Cinderella had once enjoyed running errands for her stepmother in town. It gave her a break from her beastly stepsisters. And now, while she still enjoyed the walk, every where she went she saw despair.

While buying more ginger tea one day, Cinderella saw a group of children, not much younger than her, dart into a house in back of the shop.

"What is that house?" Cinderella asked the storekeeper.

The man looked over his shoulder at the house in question. He turned back to her, concerned.

"Don't go near that place, miss. Opium den, that is."

Opium! Cinderella had seen adults acting odd in town before, but thought their behavior was due to too much wine. She had only been in the grip of Madame Morphine once, when she had to have a tooth pulled. The doctor left strict orders with her stepmother as to how much to give her and how often. She remembered the light, carefree feeling it gave her.

She knew that some women took laudanum for their headaches and then couldn't seem to stop. She was glad her stepmother wasn't one of them.

As she walked down the street, she walked by the girl she had seen the day she bought the flower for her stepmother. She was leaning against a building, seemingly half-asleep. A needle was clutched in her thin hand. The girl saw Cinderella looking at her and thrust the needle under her blanket before falling asleep.

_Without Stepmother, that would be me _Cinderella thought as she started walking. _Sleeping on the street and shooting morphine into my arm._ _Or selling my hair and teeth and body like Fantine. Constantly chasing the dragon._

Cinderella counted her change. Then she went went back into the store.

"Your tea, Stepmother," Cinderella announced later that evening. She carried a tray with two steaming mugs into her stepmother's room. One was a pale purple and the other turquoise. She set both mugs on her stepmother's night stand.

"Why two mug?" her stepmother asked as she picked up the purple one and sniffed it. "Smells different from typical ginger tea."

"That's because it's not ginger tea," Cinderella replied. "It's lavender tea. I heard it helps headaches tremendously. I had enough change left to get you a small box."

Her stepmother's blue eyes widened in surprise. "Well, isn't that thoughtful of you."

Cinderella smiled nervously. "How are you feeling? Headaches better?"

Her stepmother smirked. "Yes, child. Much better since you started massaging my back and neck every night."

"Good," Cinderella said seriously. "I am glad my pointy elbows are good for something."

"Have you read any more of _Les Miserables?" _Stepmother asked as she took a sip of her lavender tea.

Cinderella shook her head.

This time her stepmother's blue eyes narrowed at her. "Why? Don't like the story? Think you can write a better one? Well, let me tell you, young lady, you cannot. _Les Miserables _is one of the best, if not the very best, stories ever written."

Cinderella shook her head again. "It's not that. It's just…." she couldn't finish her sentence. She thought back to the girl on the street, shoving the needle under her blanket. The children, some who didn't look any older than ten, running into the opium den. She looked into her stepmother's blue eyes.

"Just what, young lady?" her stepmother asked. Her eyes narrowed into blue slits, trying to read her stepdaughter's mind. Cinderella looked down.

"I've read a little, but I've been too tired to concentrate fully," Cinderella said softly. "It's a very good book."

Her stepmother studied her coolly. Her blue eyes seemed to bore into Cinderella's soul. Cinderella felt herself begin to shake. She couldn't stop. She hid her hands in her apron pockets, but her whole body shook.

"You're trembling," her stepmother observed. She was beginning to get genuinely concerned. Cinderella wasn't acting like herself.

"I'm all right," Cinderella said, still shaking like a leaf in a thunderstorm. No matter what she did, she couldn't stop shaking. The more she tried, the more she trembled.

Cool blue eyes swept her up and down once more. "You can go to bed now, child. Thank you for the lavender tea."

Cinderella looked up, her dark eyes wide in shock. This was the second time her stepmother had thanked her for something in less than a week. "You're welcome, Stepmother. I hope it helps your headaches."

Stepmother smirked. "It does, thank you."

Cinderella kissed her cheek good night.

It was too hot to sleep in the attic that night, so Cinderella slept on the couch. She was sound asleep, so she didn't hear footsteps coming into the living room. She didn't hear a rustle of pages as Lady Tremaine picked up _Les Miserables_ and checked how far she had read. She couldn't feel a thin, long fingered hand pull the sheet she had kicked off around her waist, or that same thin had on her back.

"Oh, my poor Ella," Lady Tremaine said softly as she pushed a lock of damp blond hair off her stepdaughter's pale forehead, "what's going on in that pretty head of yours?"


	3. Chapter 3

The next few days were hotter than Cinderella ever remembered. The beastly stepsisters went to a relative's house near the sea. Cinderella watched them drive off in the carriage with a hint of jealousy in her heart. The air just hung in damp sheets. Breathing was like being underwater. She imagined the beach, nice and cool.

"Just the two of us to enjoy this heat," Stepmother said as the carriage drove off.

"Yes," Cinderella as she wiped the sweat off her brow.

Lady Tremaine smirked at her stepdaughter. "You know, with the heat, I think you shouldn't be in the kitchen too long. Why don't you just make some salad and sandwiches for dinner?"

Cinderella looked at her stepmother in surprise. Was this an act of _kindness? _

_"_What kind of sandwiches?" she asked.

Stepmother waved her thin hand. "You decide. You are good at choosing food I like," she added with another smirk. Cinderella blushed. The lavender tea had been helping her stepmother's awful headaches.

Cinderella made a salad with tomatoes, yellow bell peppers and cucumbers from the garden, with raspberry lemonade.

"You might as well eat here," Stepmother said as Cinderella set the table. "There is no point in both of us eating alone."

Cinderella's eyes widened in shock. 'Yes, madam.'

Stepmother impatiently gestured to the empty chair to her right. "Sit down, child."

Cinderella obediently plopped down.

"It's nice being just the two of us for a change, isn't it?" Lady Tremaine asked as she poured her drink. She also poured Cinderella's.

"Thank you," said a bewildered Cinderella.

Stepmother smirked. "Bring some lavender tea up to my room after dinner tonight, would you? I think it's going to rain."

"Yes ma'am."

After they finished eating, Cinderella cleared the table and washed the dishes. She cleaned up as slowly as she could. Outside, purplish gray clouds began to swirl. The wind whipped leaves backwards on the trees. Lightning flashed in the distance.

She prepared her stepmother's lavender tea, as well as a small basin of water and washcloth. It was cooling down, as rain was coming, but still very humid. Lady Tremaine would want to rinse off before going to bed.

"Your tea, madam," Cinderella announced unnecessarily. She set the tray down on the table and dunked the washcloth into the basin of cool water.

"What is that for?" Stepmother asked as she picked up her tea.

"It's hot,' Cinderella replied. "I thought you might want a rinse when I knead your shoulders."

"Well, aren't you considerate," Stepmother smirked.

She stood up so Cinderella could unfasten her dress. It was easier to massage the knots when she was wearing just her chemise.

Cinderella knelt behind her stepmother and gently ran the damp washcloth over her shoulders and neck. She began to knead the knots in Lady Tremaine's neck. Stepmother stretched her neck and got it to crack several times.

"Much better," Stepmother said as she stretched her arms.

Cinderella smiled. She started to slide of the bed but her stepmother grabbed her arm and pulled her down beside her.

"Now then, young lady, why don't you tell me what's been on your mind these last few days," Stepmother said sternly.

Cinderella looked up, terrified. The color drained from her face. "Madam?"

Her stepmother's bright blue eyes met her dark ones. "You think I haven't noticed how quiet you've been the last week or so? You have been very deep in thought about something."

Cinderella began to shake her head. "No, it's just been the heat. Too hot to-"

"You think I don't know you, Ella?" Stepmother said as she laid one thin hand on top of her trembling stepdaughter's.

"I have been your stepmother for ten years. I know when you're upset and when you are thinking about something, and the past week or so you've obviously been both."

Cinderella looked ready to cry. She opened her mouth and snapped it shut again.

Her stepmother's piercing blue eyes never left her. She had to say something.

"I-I.." she stammered. She was at a loss for words.

"Did something happen in the village?" she asked. Her blue eyes narrowed. "Did someone hurt you?"

"Hurt me?" Cinderella repeated, confused at first. "No, ma'am."

"You aren't leaving this room until you tell me what's been going in that pretty little head of yours," Stepmother said sternly. "So just tell me. Now, young lady."

Cinderella glanced away. Rain began to lash the windows. Lightning flashed in the distance. She looked at her stepmother again. Lady Tremaine raised an eyebrow.

"Just tell me, Ella," Stepmother said as she laid a surprisingly gentle hand on her stepdaughter's ashen face. "It can't be that bad. You'll feel better."

Cinderella blinked back tears and sighed. "It was that day you sent me to the village for ginger tea last week. I saw girls my age prostituting themselves. There was a girl on the street who was about my age, begging. The next day I saw her shooting morphine. There is a house behind the store that children as young as ten were going into. The shopkeeper told me it is an opium den. It dawned on me that without you, I would be doing the same thing. Selling my body for a piece of bread or a few coins or some morphine. Without you, I would be a whore."

Tears began to stream faster and faster down Cinderella's chalk white face. Stepmother dabbed them softly. Cinderella covered her eyes and began to cry. Stepmother pulled her to her and rocked her gently.

"Calm down, Ella," Stepmother said as she stroked Cinderella's back. "You're going to make yourself sick. I would never turn you out like that. I hope you know that."

Cinderella clung to her stepmother but she couldn't look up. She sobbed as she hadn't in years.

Lady Tremaine gently pried her stepdaughter off her shoulder and stroked her damp hair off her tear-stained face. She took a handkerchief and dabbed at Cinderella's red eyes. Cinderella took several shaky deep breaths and gradually calmed down.

Ella still couldn't shake the memory of the girl shooting something, probably morphine, into her arm. "I'm glad you aren't addicted to laudenam for your headaches. I'll massage you or make you tea anytime you want." She looked out the window. The wind whipped the rain sideways. She wondered what that girl she saw in town was doing to stay warm and dry.

Stepmother smirked slightly. "Such a considerate girl you are."

Cinderella blinked back tears. "Without you I'd be out there in this," she waved at the window. "Starving. Or selling my hair, teeth and body like Fantine."

Stepmother's smirk turned into a genuine smile. "Ah, so you _have _been reading _L_es_ Miserables_! Good."

Cinderella blushed slightly. "Of course I have. But I haven't been able to concentrate enough lately."

Stepmother waved her hand dismissively. "Never mind about that. I will read to you every night after you bring my tea."

Cinderella looked up, shocked. "You will?"

Stepmother smirked. "Yes._"_

_"_Um, thank you," Cinderella said, unsure of how to react to this sudden kindness.

Stepmother smirked even more. "You're welcome."

Cinderella smiled tremulously. She leaned over to kiss her stepmother goodnight but was then surprised once more.

"I want you to sleep in here tonight," Stepmother announced. "I think you are very tired and I don't want you hiking up all those stairs."

Lightning flashed and thunder boomed as rain poured down even harder. Cinderella wasn't quite sure how to feel.

"Um, thank you," she said.

She shyly laid down on the bed beside her stepmother.

"I will read to you starting tomorrow," Stepmother told her. "I am too tired tonight.".

Cinderella nodded. She trembled from head to toe, unsure of what her stepmother would say or do next.

"Why are you trembling so much?" Stepmother asked. "That afraid of me?" She took one look at her stepdaughter's face and said, "what? There's some else you aren't telling me."

Cinderella shook her head. "No, ma'am."

Lady Tremaine's eyes narrowed into blue slits. "Don't lie to me, young lady. Tell me what else is going on in that head of yours."

Cinderella shook her head more vigorously. "No, ma'am. I told you."

Her stepmother gave an exaggerated sigh. "Ella, I know when you are lying and when you are keeping something from me. You aren't going to sleep until you tell me what else you have been thinking so hard about. So tell me. Now, young lady."

Cinderella sighed. "I've been thinking about grief. How we all grieved differently when my father died. You must have been so overwhelmed, but I was too young to know how to help you. And all I could handle was my own heartache. I can't even imagine how you felt, widowed twice in a few years with another child to take care of. And how all your grief came out as anger, mostly at me. But I can't blame you."

Cinderella brought her stepmother's thin hand up to her mouth and kissed it. "you didn't have to keep me. I'm not yours. But you did and for that I will always love you."

The image of the girl shooting morphine into her arm flashed before Cinderella's eyes again. She kissed her stepmother's other hand.

"Without you, I would be a whore and a junkie," Cinderella whispered.

Her stepmother looked at her with a perplexed look. "You're growing up, aren't you, my dear?"

Cinderella nodded. "Guess so."

Stepmother seemed to be thinking. "Do you want to be mine?"

"Be yours?" Cinderella asked, confused. "How?"

Stepmother smirked. "There are ways.'

"Ways?" Cinderella repeated, more perplexed than ever. "I don't understand. How?"

"You ask too many questions," Stepmother snorted.

She reached around her stepdaughter's thin waist and untied her apron. Then she unbuttoned each button on her blue dress. She pulled the dress of her and tossed it on the floor.

"If you are going to sleep in my bed, you are going to sleep in something clean. It's too hot for this, anyway," Stepmother said with a slight smirk as she pushed Cinderella back on the bed.

Cinderella began to tremble violently again. She had never been so close to her stepmother before. And in just her chemise, no less!

Stepmother hovered over her, still smirking. "Are you sure you want to be mine?" she asked as she ran a surprising tender hand through Cinderella's blond hair.

Cinderella smiled tremulously. "Yes. What are you going to do?"

Stepmother kept stroking her hair and gave a genuine smile. "You're so innocent, Ella."

She kissed Cinderella on the mouth. Ella, while stunned, kissed back. Lady Tremaine slid her tongue inside her stepdaughter's mouth and explored.

Cinderella sighed as her stepmother trailed soft, sensual kisses down her neck and dug her fingernails into Stepmother's back. Stepmother kissed the side of her head and smiled.

"It's okay, Ella. Do you want me to stop? Or do you want me to make you mine?"

"Don't stop," Cinderella said hoarsely. "I want to be yours."

Stepmother sat up, straddling Cinderella's hips and lowered the straps of her chemise to expose her breasts. Cinderella turned several shades of pink.

"Here, feel them," Stepmother said as she took her stepdaughter's shaking hands and put them on her own breasts. She held them there as Cinderella squeezed them lightly.

Cinderella blushed furiously. Stepmother smirked. "Here," she said as she pulled Cinderella up, "taste them."

Cinderella gingerly took her stepmother's left breast into her mouth and sucked softly. Stepmother sighed.

"That's it, sweetheart," she said as she tightly gripped the back of Cinderella's head. Cinderella tightened her mouth around her stepmother's nipple, then began to suck on her stepmother's right breast.

Stepmother pushed Cinderella back down on the bed and slipped her hands under her chemise. Cinderella pushed herself up against her stepmother's tall body, which was full on top of her. Stepmother's hands slid down her back, to her hips and pulled down her underwear.

Lady Tremaine kissed her collarbone, down to her breasts. She kissed each nipple as she traveled lower and kissed each of Cinderella's ribs, then planted open mouth kisses on her flat stomach.

Cinderella practically flew off the bed when her stepmother pressed a kiss between her legs. She felt like she was flying underwater. She gripped the sheets tightly. Without looking up, Stepmother laced their fingers together as she continued to eat her out. Lips formed an airtight seal around her swollen clitoris and Stepmother sucked on it. Cinderella threw her head back and came. Her whole body shook.

Stepmother crawled back up her body and kissed her as she slid a finger into Cinderella's drenched vagina. Cinderella winced as those long fingers explored inside of her and clung to her stepmother even harder.

"You're so tight," Stepmother hissed as she pulled her finger out and lined herself up with Cinderella. She pushed Cinderella's legs apart, lay between them and began to thrust. Cinderella moaned.

Stepmother scraped her teeth along her stepdaughter's pale neck as she rode her, their legs intertwined and clits massaging each others. She thrust faster and harder, never taking her mouth off Cinderella's neck as she kissed the soft flesh, the sensitive skin behind the ear. A guttural moan escaped Stepmother's throat as she came.

She lay on top of her stepdaughter, completely worn out. Both of them were panting. Cinderella kissed her stepmother's shoulder.

"I love you," she said hoarsely. "I love you more than anyone in the whole world."

"And I love you," Stepmother replied. She kissed Cinderella's forehead and rolled off her. Cinderella crawled into her stepmother's arms, resting her head on the woman's chest. Stepmother gently stroked her hair.

"Now you are mine," Stepmother told her as they drifted to sleep.


End file.
